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Peter Clark
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Mex Reger

Sometimes wrote a bit like like Bach, only vaguer,

And by the time he'd finished

There was little anyone else could do with the chord of the diminished.

 

William Mathias,

It seems, was sent to try us

But it looks like we'll have to wait

To ask him why he was apparently so obsessed with added 6ths and 9ths and time signatures like 7/8.

 

 

Any more, anyone?

 

Peter

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An organist name of Carter

Tried hard to write a cantata.

He decided to have a good look

In his dog-eared old manuscript book

But all its pages all were blank

And remained so, to be quite frank.

 

He went to a country station

To get some inspiration,

He listened to birds, dogs and trains

And kept the sounds in his brains.

But when he went home to write

The result was nothing but rubbish.

 

R.

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A former titulaire of Notre Dame Cathedral

Was justly famous for compositions and improvisations cerebral;

Many of us, no doubt, would wish to have heard him play

- though perhaps not on the fateful occasion when he passed away.

 

 

Igor Stravinsky

Was not given to whimsy;

He did no think that the organ sounded very nice,

And wrote a very famous piece about human sacrifice.

 

 

…pay me lots of money and I will stop :lol:

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In the bleak mid-winter now frosty winds make moan

The carols all get practised, melody over drone

It wasn't writ like that at all, basses can't read the notes

So a sort of bagpipes' reedy sound now issues from their throats.

 

Let's try out another one, a tune in key of G

Sopranos won't enjoy it 'cause it goes above a C

And then below another one, the C an octave lower

And rather than andante, they'll sing it even slower.

 

Tenors now are different, they like a cheesy song

And rather than to learn it, make it up as they go along.

Contraltos hoot like tawny owls, with bulging eyes a-gleaming

But can't take on sopranos when their top C-sharps start screaming.

 

What's this story all about, does it ring a bell?

Or have you never had to train the choir conceived in Hell?

Surely if you ever have, you'll know they'll not be missed -

Best put on your wellies and gloves - become an organist.

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"Some say, compared to Bononcini,

That Mynheer Handel's but a ninny;

Others aver that he to Handel

Is scarcely fit to hold a candle:

Strange all this difference should be

'Twixt tweedle-dum and Tweedle-dee!"

 

John Byrom (1692-1763) who in 1727 wrote, An Epigram on the Feuds between Handel and Bononcini:

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At Morning Prayer - Quicunque Vult - according to Uncommon Worship

 

Whosoever will be saved; before all things it is necessary that he refrain from posting limericks about composers on the Mander Invision Power Board as these are verily indeed neither convincing nor comprehensible. They that have obeyed this injunction shall go into life everlasting; and they that have not will go into everlasting fire.

 

There; I knew I'd find a use one day for that small book gathering dust on the shelf!

 

Malcolm :lol::o:(

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Benjamin Britten

was known to be smitten

with a tenor from Lancing

and boys that did dancing

 

Giuseppe Pitoni

loved canelloni

and wrote very well you know

Cantate Domino

 

Herbert Sumsion

a man of great gumption

had a fine Willis organ

which, sadly, is long gone

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