How Would You React To...

[headcase]

...being offered mulled wine and mince pies from a silver tray, whilst playing the outgoing voluntary for service of lessons and carols.

 

Yes, the service had ended with rousing singing of Hark the Herald, final blessing from the boss and away I go into Vierne C de W. I have a page-turner on my right. As the theme enters in the pedals for the first time, I become aware of a silver tray proffered toward me from the left, held above the left jamb of the console. Speechless (well, I'm not clever enough to talk and play at the same time) I press on, hoping against hope that the tray will withdraw. After almost a full minute it finally disappeared, the holder presumably assuming that I wish to abstain.

 

I still can't believe anyone could be so -------- daft.

 

 

Bah humbug.

 

H

[DQB123]

...being offered mulled wine and mince pies from a silver tray, whilst playing the outgoing voluntary for service of lessons and carols.

 

Yes, the service had ended with rousing singing of Hark the Herald, final blessing from the boss and away I go into Vierne C de W. I have a page-turner on my right. As the theme enters in the pedals for the first time, I become aware of a silver tray proffered toward me from the left, held above the left jamb of the console. Speechless (well, I'm not clever enough to talk and play at the same time) I press on, hoping against hope that the tray will withdraw. After almost a full minute it finally disappeared, the holder presumably assuming that I wish to abstain.

 

I still can't believe anyone could be so -------- daft.

Bah humbug.

 

H

So... ermmm.... were there any mince pies left?

Q

[heva]

...being offered mulled wine and mince pies from a silver tray, whilst playing the outgoing voluntary for service of lessons and carols.

 

Yes, the service had ended with rousing singing of Hark the Herald, final blessing from the boss and away I go into Vierne C de W. I have a page-turner on my right. As the theme enters in the pedals for the first time, I become aware of a silver tray proffered toward me from the left, held above the left jamb of the console. Speechless (well, I'm not clever enough to talk and play at the same time) I press on, hoping against hope that the tray will withdraw. After almost a full minute it finally disappeared, the holder presumably assuming that I wish to abstain.

 

I still can't believe anyone could be so -------- daft.

Bah humbug.

 

H

 

Any idea how long altar boys can wait at H.comm. while I'm playing the choirorgan?

They just don't go away ...

[Vox Humana]

Oh my goodness!

 

Clearly anyone capable of doing that couldn't care less about your contribution and the work you must have put into it. Once when a similar thing happened I stopped dead and smiled sweetly at the offending moron, hoping they would be suitably embarrassed, but of course the point was totally lost on them; they didn't bat an eyelid.

 

In your case I think I would have been torn between four options:

 

1) like you, simply pressing on and ignoring the offer;

 

2) sharply telling the individual concerned to go forth and multiply (not quite in those words);

 

3) pretending to lunge for a stop at the top of the jamb, but instead sharply thwacking the bottom of the tray upwards and backwards very hard - with luck the wine would ruin a dress or a shirt;

 

4) stopping dead and very publicly administering a loud harangue about interrupting a service before it has finished;

 

But I fear charity would have got the better of me and I'd have opted for 1).

[Guest Andrew Butler]

Whilst playing, by invitation, for Mass in france last summer (Allen toaster at floor level, I had a collecting plate stuffed under my nose whilst playing the "offertoire". They gave up after I stoically ignored them!

[jfdg]

Whoever had such an idea as floor level consoles.... They are an absolute nightmare for me, especially playing for services in a school chapel where during a voluntary people will walk past and say "can i press a key?" I have learnt how to refuse them permission while still playing, but sometimes this doesn't deter them. How nice it is at church to have an organ loft!

[john carter]

...being offered mulled wine and mince pies from a silver tray, whilst playing the outgoing voluntary for service of lessons and carols.

 

Yes, the service had ended with rousing singing of Hark the Herald, final blessing from the boss and away I go into Vierne C de W. I have a page-turner on my right. As the theme enters in the pedals for the first time, I become aware of a silver tray proffered toward me from the left, held above the left jamb of the console. Speechless (well, I'm not clever enough to talk and play at the same time) I press on, hoping against hope that the tray will withdraw. After almost a full minute it finally disappeared, the holder presumably assuming that I wish to abstain.

 

I still can't believe anyone could be so -------- daft.

Bah humbug.

 

H

 

Come now, surely you could have managed a mince pie in bar 63? It would need to be offered from the right hand side though!

 

JC

[Guest Barry Williams]

Come now, surely you could have managed a mince pie in bar 63? It would need to be offered from the right hand side though!

 

JC

 

I used to deputise at a church where the lay reader had a regular habit of coming to the organ loft (about twenty feet up), before the evening service, standing closely beside the console and prefacing his remarks with the phrase "Don't stop playing, I just wanted to tell you about...."

 

I stopped playing and said, politely, "Is there something I can help with?" He then told me about the latest alteration in the service. After this I continued playing the voluntary.

 

He never got the message.

 

Barry Williams

[Guest Lee Blick]

...being offered mulled wine and mince pies from a silver tray, whilst playing the outgoing voluntary for service of lessons and carols.

 

Yes, the service had ended with rousing singing of Hark the Herald, final blessing from the boss and away I go into Vierne C de W. I have a page-turner on my right. As the theme enters in the pedals for the first time, I become aware of a silver tray proffered toward me from the left, held above the left jamb of the console. Speechless (well, I'm not clever enough to talk and play at the same time) I press on, hoping against hope that the tray will withdraw. After almost a full minute it finally disappeared, the holder presumably assuming that I wish to abstain.

 

I still can't believe anyone could be so -------- daft.

Bah humbug.

 

H

 

You should have opened your mouth in expectation....

[pcnd5584]

I used to deputise at a church where the lay reader had a regular habit of coming to the organ loft (about twenty feet up), before the evening service, standing closely beside the console and prefacing his remarks with the phrase "Don't stop playing, I just wanted to tell you about...."

 

I stopped playing and said, politely, "Is there something I can help with?" He then told me about the latest alteration in the service. After this I continued playing the voluntary.

 

He never got the message.

 

Barry Williams

 

Someone did something similar last Saturday, whilst I was playing the organ in a village church for the wedding of an acquaintance. Just as I started to play a reasonably busy chorale prelude, he approached the console and said something to the effect of "Hello. The bride and groom asked me to give you this - will I put it down here?". I managed to respond with: "How should I know?" And then turned my full attention back to the task in hand.

 

I never found what 'it' was. By the time I was able to look down, the gentleman in question had retired (presumably in a huff) to another part of the building. There was nothing on the floor near the organ. No doubt I had just passed-up the chance of receiving as a gift, a bottle of Saint-Emilion Crand Cru (2000), or similar.

[AJJ]

Someone did something similar last Saturday, whilst I was playing the organ in a village church for the wedding of an acquaintance. Just as I started to play a reasonably busy chorale prelude, he approached the console and said something to the effect of "Hello. The bride and groom asked me to give you this - will I put it down here?". I managed to respond with: "How should I know?" And then turned my full attention back to the task in hand.

 

I never found what 'it' was. By the time I was able to look down, the gentleman in question had retired (presumably in a huff) to another part of the building. There was nothing on the floor near the organ. No doubt I had just passed-up the chance of receiving as a gift, a bottle of Saint-Emilion Crand Cru (2000), or similar.

 

I was once playing for a wedding at church where I sometimes help out - the previous vicar had returned to do the deed and I had not seen him for a while. The signal that the bride had arrived was for someone to wave violently from the west door - I would see this in the mirror and start on the Queen of Sheba. With a few minutes to go I started to get set up for the procession when the wave came I started playing. It wasn't till the last page that I found out (from my pal the previous vicar when he arrived to tell me to stop playing) that his wave had been not a signal that the bride had arrived but just one to say hello!

 

AJJ

[DQB123]

Oh my goodness!

 

Clearly anyone capable of doing that couldn't care less about your contribution and the work you must have put into it.

 

Well we still haven't heard if this unfortunate dear organist ever got a mince pie and mulled wine. Surely they must have appreciated his offering or else a mince pie and mulled wine would not have been offered...

 

2) sharply telling the individual concerned to go forth and multiply (not quite in those words);

 

3) pretending to lunge for a stop at the top of the jamb, but instead sharply thwacking the bottom of the tray upwards and backwards very hard - with luck the wine would ruin a dress or a shirt;

 

4) stopping dead and very publicly administering a loud harangue about interrupting a service before it has finished;

 

Shame on you!!!! Such unkindness in response to a kindness.... After all most people (clergy included) couldn't give a monkey's about organ playing after services - especially when refreshments are concerned!

[Vox Humana]

Well we still haven't heard if this unfortunate dear organist ever got a mince pie and mulled wine. Surely they must have appreciated his offering or else a mince pie and mulled wine would not have been offered...

You reckon? I wouldn't presume to speak for Rick, but if it had been me I would be strongly suspecting that the offer was made precisely in order to stop me playing!

 

After all most people (clergy included) couldn't give a monkey's about organ playing after services

Eheu! Et tu, Brute?

 

Hie thee to Germany. Or Scandinavia.

[Guest Lee Blick]

Well we still haven't heard if this unfortunate dear organist ever got a mince pie and mulled wine. Surely they must have appreciated his offering or else a mince pie and mulled wine would not have been offered...

Shame on you!!!! Such unkindness in response to a kindness.... After all most people (clergy included) couldn't give a monkey's about organ playing after services - especially when refreshments are concerned!

 

I think a sign "Do not feed the organist" would be appropriate, or, "Do not interrupt organist unless you have caviar or money", or if it is a church/chapel with visiting organists, "Do not disturb unless you offering cash to cease the organist from playing".

[Barry Jordan]

Eheu! Et tu, Brute?

 

Hie thee to Germany. Or Scandinavia.

 

No no, this bit about Germans just loving the organ music after the service is all nonsense. I know, I work there.

 

They sit down - and talk. Instead of leaving while talking. They also talk while the choir is singing during the administration, until the service, and during the motet, if they get half a chance.

 

And then they tell you that the voluntary was too long, and all the preludes too.

 

Personally, if they're not going to listen, I'd rather they just buggered off and left me to play in peace....then I wouldn't have to practise so much.

 

Cheers, humbug, Christmas!

Barry

[MusingMuso]

...being offered mulled wine and mince pies from a silver tray, whilst playing the outgoing voluntary for service of lessons and carols.

 

As the theme enters in the pedals for the first time, I become aware of a silver tray proffered toward me from the left, held above the left jamb of the console.

H

 

=========================

 

I wouldn't care whether I was playing Bach or Vierne (except that I don't play the latter), the final voluntary would have been miraculously improved by the astonishing re-discovery of a pedal cadenza; previously thought lost or discarded.

 

Call it a weakness of mine....call it improvisation....call it gluttony if you will, but I would have thanked the person holding the tray, removed it from their hands and given the entire contents to the poor and unrecognised of the parish.....myself.

 

I recall playing each year for a public school carol service in the Yorkshire Dales, and then being invited to just this particular delight; except that the mothers of the boys had supplied the mice-pies. This in turn meant that the mothers vied with each other to produce the very finest known to mankind, with exotic mixes, varied pastries, some with a clear hint of something stronger in them, brown ones, white ones and egg-coated golden-coloured ones.

 

The trick in this situation is never to remain static, but to be unusually gregarious: moving towards the tables where mince-pies and wine still remain unclaimed.

 

At each and every table or small gathering, you say the same thing, "Oh! I didn't know we had mince pies. I must try one."

 

A beaming mother watches the organist eat, and the organist must always say, "My words, that is the best mince-pie I have ever tasted."

 

You then get another one, but not before slipping your half-empty wine-glass alongside a full-one, and picking up the wrong glass!

 

I find a dozen mince-pies is about the upper limit, but music-cases are ideal hiding places. Always go prepared with a large paper bag.

[Vox Humana]

the mice-pies.

You sure do eat some weird things in Yorkshire.

[DQB123]

=========================

 

I wouldn't care whether I was playing Bach or Vierne (except that I don't play the latter), the final voluntary would have been miraculously improved by the astonishing re-discovery of a pedal cadenza; previously thought lost or discarded.

 

Call it a weakness of mine....call it improvisation....call it gluttony if you will, but I would have thanked the person holding the tray, removed it from their hands and given the entire contents to the poor and unrecognised of the parish.....myself.

 

I recall playing each year for a public school carol service in the Yorkshire Dales, and then being invited to just this particular delight; except that the mothers of the boys had supplied the mice-pies. This in turn meant that the mothers vied with each other to produce the very finest known to mankind, with exotic mixes, varied pastries, some with a clear hint of something stronger in them, brown ones, white ones and egg-coated golden-coloured ones.

 

The trick in this situation is never to remain static, but to be unusually gregarious: moving towards the tables where mince-pies and wine still remain unclaimed.

 

At each and every table or small gathering, you say the same thing, "Oh! I didn't know we had mince pies. I must try one."

 

A beaming mother watches the organist eat, and the organist must always say, "My words, that is the best mince-pie I have ever tasted."

 

You then get another one, but not before slipping your half-empty wine-glass alongside a full-one, and picking up the wrong glass!

 

I find a dozen mince-pies is about the upper limit, but music-cases are ideal hiding places. Always go prepared with a large paper bag.

 

At last! Profound wisdom.... (mouth open to receive mince (or mice) pies and mulled wine). After all, which is more important, voluntary or refreshments (presumably free because it's Christmas??)

 

PS... nice touch, the silver tray n'est pas???

 

PPS... why couldn't the page turner grab some mince pies and mulled wine for you? Pretty useless bloke otherwise.... Have you not got one of those useful places at the foot of the stop jamb to place them on until the final chord of the Carillon de Vestmeenstair?

[Paul Morley]

I don't know abhout being talked to/at during a service, but consider how you might react to one or other of the following:

 

* A CD of worship songs being piped throught the PA system 10 seconds into a concluding voluntary.

 

* Chairs being moved during a concert, right in the middle of a perfomance of a piece of unaccompanied flute music.

 

* Incumbent receiving a formal letter of complaint about 'heavy' organ music before the services. No further clarification was ever given, and I do not know to this day whether what was being played was considered to be too loud, too modern, too intellectual or containing too may 'Motorhead' quotations.

 

* Palm Sunday. The Choir sang 'Komm ihr tochter' (in English). The abilty/experience level of the singers ranged fron music graduate to non-reader. They sang superbly. Maybe not up to the standard of 'The Sixteen', but with total commitment and passion. The accompanist played wonderfully. They were a priviledge to conduct. As the final entry of the chorale (sung by a soloist) soared above the ripieno chorus with the words 'Have mercy on me, O Jesu' there were members of the congregation and choir (myself included) with tears in their eyes. It was one of the most musically satisfying and spiritually uplifting experiences of my life. The first comment that I recived from a member of the clergy was, 'That was very long'.

[jfdg]

I don't know abhout being talked to/at during a service, but consider how you might react to one or other of the following:

 

* A CD of worship songs being piped throught the PA system 10 seconds into a concluding voluntary.

 

* Chairs being moved during a concert, right in the middle of a perfomance of a piece of unaccompanied flute music.

 

* Incumbent receiving a formal letter of complaint about 'heavy' organ music before the services. No further clarification was ever given, and I do not know to this day whether what was being played was considered to be too loud, too modern, too intellectual or containing too may 'Motorhead' quotations.

 

* Palm Sunday. The Choir sang 'Komm ihr tochter' (in English). The abilty/experience level of the singers ranged fron music graduate to non-reader. They sang superbly. Maybe not up to the standard of 'The Sixteen', but with total commitment and passion. The accompanist played wonderfully. They were a priviledge to conduct. As the final entry of the chorale (sung by a soloist) soared above the ripieno chorus with the words 'Have mercy on me, O Jesu' there were members of the congregation and choir (myself included) with tears in their eyes. It was one of the most musically satisfying and spiritually uplifting experiences of my life. The first comment that I recived from a member of the clergy was, 'That was very long'.

 

:angry: :angry: :angry: :angry:

 

O dear o dear o dear! We think we've seen it all then these sort of things happen. How did you react btw?

[MusingMuso]

You sure do eat some weird things in Yorkshire. :angry:

 

 

==================

 

 

Gerbils are better, but they're a bugger to catch.

 

:angry:

 

MM

[Paul Morley]

O dear o dear o dear! We think we've seen it all then these sort of things happen. How did you react btw?

 

I resigned shortly after the last incident. In fact, I have just come to the end of four fruitful and happy years at another church. I should stress that I left this post on very good terms with everyone - I simply wanted to sit in a pew with my family on a Sunday morning (and chill out with a glass of wine on Sunday evenings).

 

BTW, apologies to all board members who may have been offended by the the poor standard of grammar and spelling in my last post.

[DouglasCorr]

I still remember it! 35 years ago, at the conclusion of the Midnight Service on Christmas Eve, in a large church in Vancouver (the 4 manual organ had a fanfare trumpet over the door; it also had a detatched console at ground level). Near the end of the concluding voluntary, Dieu Parmi Nous, someone shouting at the organist- "Use the trumpets Fred!! What about the trumpets???!!"... :angry:

[Guest Roffensis]

...being offered mulled wine and mince pies from a silver tray, whilst playing the outgoing voluntary for service of lessons and carols.

 

Yes, the service had ended with rousing singing of Hark the Herald, final blessing from the boss and away I go into Vierne C de W. I have a page-turner on my right. As the theme enters in the pedals for the first time, I become aware of a silver tray proffered toward me from the left, held above the left jamb of the console. Speechless (well, I'm not clever enough to talk and play at the same time) I press on, hoping against hope that the tray will withdraw. After almost a full minute it finally disappeared, the holder presumably assuming that I wish to abstain.

 

I still can't believe anyone could be so -------- daft.

Bah humbug.

 

H

 

 

I had a similar thing happen to me when a Women's Fellowship woman asked for a hymnbook while I was playing the voluntary. I took my hands off the keys and said "Pardon"..........she flinched, and apologised. I then continued from exactly where I had left off!!!

 

It works!!!

 

R