Weddings and Funerals : Some Odd Requests for Music

[handsoff]

I have recently been sorting out some odds and ends associated with music and the services for which I have played the organ and decided to throw out the many service sheets for weddings and funerals I for some reason had kept. Most were entirely predictable and unremarkable but a few stood out and it is these I shall mention here. I have until recently covered this type of service in three churches but 2 out of 3 oddities come from services at the church with the best of the organs, a 2M + P 9 stop very bright and pleasant Nicholson.

The most enjoyable was a wedding of an older couple who were quite knowledgeable about music and involved me in their discussions. They were keen to have a good selection of music before the service and promised me that their guests would be requested to remain quiet as I played and treat it as a concert. The music, the titles of which were printed on the order of service was :-

Jesu Joy of Man's Desiring

Salut d'Amour  

Short P & F in G Minor (JSB (probably..)) which they had heard me play in the church and liked

Pachelbel Canon

Hymnus by Vangelis, a sort of simple hymn tune, very easy, a bit predictable but easy on the ear, as the bride entered.

All carefully timed so that the last piece ended about 15 seconds after the bride's arrival which she promised faithfully would be spot on time. It was.

During signing the register - Jesu Joy again

Postlude - Wedding March.

 

The hymns were Love Divine and Lead Us Heavenly Father

I was given double my usual fee and very kindly given credit in the programme  order of service.

 

The next one of note was a funeral in the same church which turned out to be rather less musical. The only music required was "The Old Rugged Cross" played twice as the coffin entered, as the hymn and then again until the church emptied. Nothing else.

 

My most eventful in a non-musical sense was in one of the other churches where a couple were married with the costumes having a Peaky Blinders theme. The rector was concerned that she might have to abandon the service as there were fears that the whole bunch of them would be in the village pub until kick-off. In the event it wasn't that bad. Quite... The groom and best man were mostly sober and dressed as Peaky Blinders but did agree to remove their flat caps for the service. Some of the audience were a little the worse for wear but remained reasonably well behaved if a bit noisy and some even removed their headgear.

The music before was organist's choice, the hymns some odd words to the tune of Morning has Broken and I Vow to Thee My Country on the basis that  they would at least know the tunes. For the register signing it was "Red Right Hand" aka the Peaky Blinders theme in a reduction for piano,  and afterwards some noisy rubbish on CD.

The bride and groom made the short journey from church to pub in a horse and carriage for the reception. I was later told that true to form there was much drinking culminating in punch-ups to which the police were called. Twice.

Anyone else with some good stuff?

 

 

 

 

 

 

[S_L]

I expect we could all write a book on our experiences of weddings - and, possibly, funerals too! In our tiny little Abbey the brides would contact me direct. You always knew the ones that were going to be difficult! The phone would ring and I'd hear "My daughter is getting married .............." 

A mother got very 'shirty' with me when I pointed out that Widor was not a good idea for the bride to COME IN to!! She insisted and the bride arrived at the nave altar after the first page and stood there whilst the rest of it was played. The officiating Priest wasn't too happy but the Bride's mother seemed happy enough!

I used to play, occasionally, at an 'Estate church', a housing estate church. It had a pub across the road and frequently the entire wedding party would be ensconced in the pub prior to the wedding. On one occasion the priest went across the road to remind them it was time for the wedding. The worst ones, the rowdiest, were the 17h00 on a Saturday afternoon!

Payment was another interesting area. "Give the money to the Officiant at the rehearsal" I would say. Mostly it came, sometimes it didn't and I would have to confront the best man - or the bridal couple as they were getting into the car to go to the reception!!!! But the most memorable was a little couple, they were slightly older too, who came to see me after High Mass one Sunday in January/February. They were getting married in August and wanted to ask if I would play the organ for their wedding. It wasn't a problem and I put it in my diary and suggested they contacted me nearer the date to sort out the music. They didn't mind, I could play anything I deemed suitable. They didn't want any hymns because there would be hardly anyone there to sing them. They asked about payment and I, as usual, said to pay the Priest at the rehearsal. No, they would like to pay me now and they counted out the fee in, mostly, silver with the odd pound note. They had been saving up. August came and I did the wedding. There was no one there apart from two witnesses. The bride was dressed in 'normal' type clothes, the groom similarly. I think one of the witnesses took a few photographs and, as I was driving home, I saw them - standing at the bus stop!! Later that evening, I had their address, I put the fee in an envelope and popped it through their letter box. I've never forgotten that wedding.

'Dear Lord and Father of mankind' was a hymn often chosen at weddings - 'forgive our foolish ways' and the last verse 'Breathe through the heats of our desire'! I've had 'Colours of day' at a funeral 'so light up the fire, let the flame burn' I have never had 'Fight the good fight' at a wedding. I often thought that they chose hymns that they had sung at school. Nowadays state schools rarely sing hymns, if at all - but I don't do weddings any more so I wouldn't know what is current!

And so on ........................................

I'll let someone else have a turn!!!

[madorganist]

Whilst not strictly on the theme of unusual musical requests, I have played for a couple of funerals where the local Constabulary was out in force.

In one case it was the funeral of “ The Chief Executive” of a mobile tarmacking firm. The precession to the cemetery being escorted front and rear by tarmac wagons – with several police cars at a discrete distance .

In another, the sons of the deceased had to sit on opposite sides of the church in case things kicked off. Both sons being heavily restrained, handcuffed to two officers each and completely surrounded by members of prison staff and the local constabulary.

Playing for a wedding at a packed church, people standing round the console and other leaning against it, I overheard one young lady say to her intended “ When we get married we aint ‘avvin no ‘imms, cos no-one heffing sings ’em” – charming !

[Colin Pykett]

During the signing of the registers the music was played by a very good string quartet consisting of young people at a London conservatoire, friends of the bride.  They were grouped around the detached console of the organ.  After the service, having observed me playing, one of them said "I had no idea organists played with their feet."

[Andrew Butler]

On 18/09/2023 at 19:06, handsoff said:

I have recently been sorting out some odds and ends associated with music and the services for which I have played the organ and decided to throw out the many service sheets for weddings and funerals I for some reason had kept. Most were entirely predictable and unremarkable but a few stood out and it is these I shall mention here. I have until recently covered this type of service in three churches but 2 out of 3 oddities come from services at the church with the best of the organs, a 2M + P 9 stop very bright and pleasant Nicholson.

The most enjoyable was a wedding of an older couple who were quite knowledgeable about music and involved me in their discussions. They were keen to have a good selection of music before the service and promised me that their guests would be requested to remain quiet as I played and treat it as a concert. The music, the titles of which were printed on the order of service was :-

Jesu Joy of Man's Desiring

Salut d'Amour  

Short P & F in G Minor (JSB (probably..)) which they had heard me play in the church and liked

Pachelbel Canon

Hymnus by Vangelis, a sort of simple hymn tune, very easy, a bit predictable but easy on the ear, as the bride entered.

All carefully timed so that the last piece ended about 15 seconds after the bride's arrival which she promised faithfully would be spot on time. It was.

During signing the register - Jesu Joy again

Postlude - Wedding March.

 

The hymns were Love Divine and Lead Us Heavenly Father

I was given double my usual fee and very kindly given credit in the programme  order of service.

 

The next one of note was a funeral in the same church which turned out to be rather less musical. The only music required was "The Old Rugged Cross" played twice as the coffin entered, as the hymn and then again until the church emptied. Nothing else.

 

My most eventful in a non-musical sense was in one of the other churches where a couple were married with the costumes having a Peaky Blinders theme. The rector was concerned that she might have to abandon the service as there were fears that the whole bunch of them would be in the village pub until kick-off. In the event it wasn't that bad. Quite... The groom and best man were mostly sober and dressed as Peaky Blinders but did agree to remove their flat caps for the service. Some of the audience were a little the worse for wear but remained reasonably well behaved if a bit noisy and some even removed their headgear.

The music before was organist's choice, the hymns some odd words to the tune of Morning has Broken and I Vow to Thee My Country on the basis that  they would at least know the tunes. For the register signing it was "Red Right Hand" aka the Peaky Blinders theme in a reduction for piano,  and afterwards some noisy rubbish on CD.

The bride and groom made the short journey from church to pub in a horse and carriage for the reception. I was later told that true to form there was much drinking culminating in punch-ups to which the police were called. Twice.

Anyone else with some good stuff?

 

 

 

 

 

 

I've just PM'd you - I've been asked to play the Vangelis piece and am looking for a copy!!

[S_L]

1 hour ago, Andrew Butler said:

I've just PM'd you - I've been asked to play the Vangelis piece and am looking for a copy!!

I'd never heard of it but I found a version on YouTube - it's easy enough to transcribe to manuscript. Attractive little piece but it doesn't go anywhere!!!

[Andrew Butler]

31 minutes ago, S_L said:

I'd never heard of it but I found a version on YouTube - it's easy enough to transcribe to manuscript. Attractive little piece but it doesn't go anywhere!!!

I've found it on YouTube too.  I'm being lazy!!

[handsoff]

I've just replied Andrew - been in the garden for the past couple of hours!

 

Best wishes

 

 

[S_L]

3 hours ago, Andrew Butler said:

I've found it on YouTube too.  I'm being lazy!!

Yes, of course! But I find that doing things like this keeps me awake. It's easy, it's simple but, when you get to over 70, little challenges, taking 10/15 minutes, are a sort of therapy! If that makes sense!!!

[Andrew Butler]

17 hours ago, S_L said:

Yes, of course! But I find that doing things like this keeps me awake. It's easy, it's simple but, when you get to over 70, little challenges, taking 10/15 minutes, are a sort of therapy! If that makes sense!!!

Oh absolutely!  I get enough of that playing at church here - I've learned to have manuscript paper with me to transcribe things before services that the cantor hums to me because they haven't got the music!

[AndrewG]

Church funerals seem to falling out of fashion in my experience.  With more Crematoria based services with piped music (not in the right sense!)  A newly built chapel near me has no organ or any means of playing live music, with everything coming from a sound system - even the hymns (if any). 
 

In terms of unusual choices at a funeral I was asked to play Darth Vader’s March at the end of a service for a teenager.  Which they followed with Mr Brightside by The Killers blasted over the PA as the coffin left.